Holiday Schemes
by samurai-ashes
Summary: Mokuba knows what he wants for Christmas, but he needs to convince Santa first... [YuugixMokuba - fluff, OOC!Mokuba]


**_Ashes doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh or anything else mentioned herein that would involve ownership. That includes the song that's going to be mentioned._**

* * *

**- warnings -**  
fluff, humor 

**- notes -**  
Since there are quite a few, I'm going to hide them at the bottom. ^_^ But I will say here that this is quite OOC on Mokuba's part; seriously, I don't think one of you could deny it, lol. I just thought it was such a cute visual… More on that at the bottom. Also, this is in no way, shape, or form related to Third Grade Logic. Just in case anyone thought it was, lol. Also, I find it odd that I used Japanese names and a Western holiday… um, I'm sorry? Lol, just not in the mood for dub names right now, I suppose. Actually, come to think of it, everyone is pretty exaggerated for the sake of humor in this story, haha. Hopefully it's not bad. *coughs, partially from nervousness over said fact and partially from cold* 

* * *

"Jou! You made it!" Mokuba called to the blond, who had just walked in the door. He was waiting in a local diner for Jounouchi, sitting patiently at a booth in the corner; in front of him he had a notebook. He had a can of soda to his left, but it was mostly ignored; his real agenda was the notebook - or rather, the plans written on the paper that the notebook was open to. 

Jounouchi held a finger to his lips and scurried over like he was being followed. He slipped into the seat across from Mokuba. "I think Honda might have followed me; he suspects I'm out seeing some girl." He rolled his eyes. "Even for a guy he pays way too much attention to girls." 

Mokuba giggled. "I don't think that's what he's really worried about…" 

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

Mokuba shook his head quickly, hair flying around his face. "Nothing, nothing at all. Here, this is why I asked you to meet me here in secret." He pushed the notebook towards Jounouchi, grinning. Jounouchi turned the notebook so he could read it. He blinked. 

"These are lyrics… Christmas carol lyrics. Are you inviting me caroling?" 

"No, no, past the lyrics. Read the plans." 

Jounouchi grabbed Mokuba's soda and took a sip, reading on. Within moments he spit the soda back out onto the paper. Mokuba laughed and used a napkin to wipe up the mess as Jounouchi sputtered, "Y-y-you want to… WHAT?" 

"Oh, don't have a heart attack," Mokuba said, patting Jounouchi's hand. For a moment he seemed to be older and Jounouchi seemed to be younger. "But I take it you understand?" 

"A-aren't you a little too young to like boys?" Jounouchi asked with a raised eyebrow. 

Mokuba shrugged. "So I act a little old for my age; it's just… how I am." 

"Well, yea, but YUUGI… he's, well, really shy about that sort of thing… what you're proposing here is… A little out for how he usually acts." 

Mokuba grinned. "It'll be fun!" 

"It'll be embarrassing." 

"Will you help?" 

Jounouchi bit his lower lip, looking over the plan again. He scanned the paper and grinned. "You realize that this song isn't really about romance, right?" 

Mokuba nodded vigorously. "That's the great part; if you don't THINK about it, it sounds silly and fun. But I'll make him think about it…" Mokuba winked. "But will you help; I can't do it by myself." 

Jounouchi clicked his tongue and leaned on his elbow, brow furrowed in thought. "You're out of your mind if you think it's going to be easy to convince Yuugi to dress up like that." 

"I know, but if anyone can do it, you can, Jou." 

"And you realize that it's going to be hard to get him to go to a party; he's not much of a partier." 

"But if you-" Mokuba was starting to sound more crestfallen. 

"AND he might already have plans for tomorrow night; this is really short notice." 

Mokuba looked down at the table and sighed. "I didn't think-" 

He was cut off by another click of Jounouchi's tongue. "And if your brother finds out I had any part of this, you'd better give me a really nice eulogy." 

Mokuba's grin widened. "So that's a yes?" 

Jounouchi nodded. "Yea, I'll help. But I'm taking pictures," he warned. "I want this documented." 

"Thanks! You can keep that paper out for reference if you need it." 

Jounouchi complied and ripped out the paper, shoving it into his pocket. "I don't want it for reference, I want it for proof. So tomorrow at six?" 

"Yup; thanks, Jou." 

Jounouchi winked. "It's nothing, kid. I'd better go before Honda hunts me down and demands to know where I've been." 

--

_"Jou, are you out of your mind? I don't look a thing like Santa!" Yuugi protested, holding his hands up as if to ward off Jounouchi's suggestion. "Why would you even consider suggesting me?" _

"Well, you're… uh… so big-hearted," Jounouchi said quickly, "and you like kids, right?" 

"But I'm too short! And young! And the hair, Jou!" 

"We can get a hat…" Yuugi glared at him pointedly. "Uh, a BIG hat." 

"Jou, no. I can't be Santa." 

"But Yuugi…!" Jounouchi paused. "The kids are EXPECTING Santa to be there; they're gonna be disappointed if you don't do it. All you gotta do is pitch your voice a little deeper and be jolly." 

Yuugi didn't like that guilt trip, tried not to look at Jounouchi… "Fine," he grumbled; he didn't like the idea of sad kids. He was such a sap some days. "But how do you expect to make me into a believable Santa?" 

"Well, Santa's never been a very tall guy; we just need a suit, some pillows, maybe some temporary spray dye or something for your hair…" 

"This is going to be awful; when is this party?" 

"Uh… tomorrow." 

"TOMORROW!?" 

Yuugi sighed. That was how he found himself sitting in an armchair, crammed into a bright red suit and stuffed with pillows. Jounouchi had somehow procured a large Santa hat, which seemed to cover enough of Yuugi's hair. In fact, with the fake white beard tied to his head, the kids didn't seem to think he was at all out of place. Never mind that they were all toddlers and therefore probably didn't realize that Yuugi didn't have the right look for Santa, and probably wouldn't remember him in two days. And of course, like any Christmas party, there were cheesy Christmas carols - sung by kids - piping over the speaker system of the building; within an hour Yuugi wanted to plug his ears. If he ever heard "Deck the Halls" again, he was going to loose his mind. He swore that whoever was in charge of the music had the same CD on repeat for two hours. 

By six, when parents started ushering their kids out, Yuugi was exhausted. He had never realized that toddlers were so exhausting, and all he had done was sit in a chair and let them sit on his lap and babble while "elves" took pictures. He had a new respect for parents. 

There were a few people cleaning up wrapping paper… and Yuugi was just leaning back his chair, wondering if he really had to move. He was engulfed in pillows; that seemed like a comfortable enough place to sleep. Jounouchi was smiling at him. "Hey man, how'd it go?" 

Yuugi groaned. "Boring, and if one more kid kicks me in the crotch, I don't think I'll be able to have children," he explained. "Not that I'd complain at this point…" He sat up to move. 

"Ah, wait! I want to get a picture of you sitting by yourself!" Jounouchi said hurriedly. Yuugi sighed and posed, even smiled. Just as the flash went off the speaker system made a noise, like a click. 

"Oh god, are they starting that CD again?" Yuugi wondered aloud. "I swear my ears'll start bleeding…" Instead a more sedate, almost oldies sounding beat came over the speakers. 

"_Santa baby,_" a coquettish voice sang. Yuugi knew that song - actually, he sort of liked it - but it certainly didn't sound like Marilyn Monroe singing… Didn't sound bad, thought. Hey, he was missing the song! "_...Been an awful good girl. Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight._" Yuugi nearly fell out of his chair in surprise as Mokuba turned a corner of a nearby doorway, leaning against the doorway. Mokuba could sing? Wait, he wasn't a girl! …But he looked like he had paid more attention to his appearance. He was wearing black jeans and a loose red shirt; the sleeves ran down to about his elbows and just seemed to hang there. In fact, the whole shirt looked like it was precariously close to falling off his right shoulder; at least all the buttons were done up the front - Yuugi would have been very suspicious if they had been undone. Mokuba's hair framed his face, and the way he was looking at Yuugi it seemed… hell, it seemed almost sexy. Were twelve-year-olds allowed to be sexy? Yuugi didn't know. 

Wait, why the hell was Jounouchi just taking pictures? And would Yuugi get copies? On top of that, why was Mokuba singing a Marilyn Monroe song? And where had he gotten a microphone? Or control of the speaker system? There was something very suspicious about the whole situation… 

Mokuba was still singing, "_…Think of all the fun I've missed, think of all the fellows that I haven't kissed. Next year I could be just as good if you check off my Christmas list._" He was advancing towards Yuugi ever so slowly as he sang, grinning like he knew something the rest of the world didn't. Damn, the kid could sing. At least, from the words Yuugi was catching he deduced that Mokuba could sing; as it stood he was having trouble concentrating on the words. He was more focused on figuring out why Mokuba was singing, and why Mokuba was looking directly at him. He suddenly felt ridiculous, dressed up in a Santa suit, fluffed with pillows… 

Holy… He was dressed as Santa. Mokuba was singing Marilyn Monroe, and he was dressed up as Santa. He stared in awe as Mokuba kept singing. 

"_...really that's not a lot; been an angel all year, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight._" Mokuba took a moment from his sauntering to lean against a wall, still singing. Yuugi replaced his earlier assessment of "almost sexy" with "very sexy," and immediately felt like a pervert. He was beginning to wonder if it really was Mokuba singing, or if it was some trick, like an evil ploy to seduce Yuugi… maybe to the dark side? Yes, that was the most logical explanation. Mokuba Kaiba didn't strut around and act sexy; he was too… well, young! And twelve! Therefore, it had to be a clone that was singing to him. "_Santa cutie..._" 

Right… clone… Super sexy clones? Somewhere in the back of his mind Yuugi told himself that if the bad guys of the world had super sexy clones, the good guys were doomed; but most of Yuugi's mind was spent concentrating on Mokuba… or the Mokuba clone. Whatever. He squirmed in his seat, trying not to look like he was sitting on hot coals as Mokuba was walking towards him. How far was Mokuba into the song? 

It didn't matter; Mokuba dropped into his lap and gently tossed his hair back over his shoulder. Holy crap, just who was this kid? Wasn't Mokuba more… well, boy-ish? "_Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing..._" Mokuba leaned in for a kiss, and Yuugi… well, Yuugi wasn't sure what to do. Was that Jounouchi's camera flashing at them? Holy shit, Jounouchi was still taking pictures? Yuugi said a little prayer for his soul; he knew that if Kaiba ever saw those pictures, his life was over. He would make up his will when he got home - if he made it home. The gods only knew what was waiting for him outside; the fact that he was being seduced by what was either a clone or a strangely sexy twelve-year-old was enough to prove that the world had turned upside since he had dressed up as Santa. 

The lips pressed against his were a little more insistent, and Yuugi figured if he was being seduced to the side of evil, he couldn't come up with a better way to go out than kissing Mokuba… or a sexy Mokuba clone; he still hadn't decided. It would be his luck that just as he got a quick taste of the boy in his lap - sweet, like Christmas desserts - the lips were pulled away. What a tease. 

Oh. The song. Mokuba's last words breathless: "_Hurry down the chimney tonight. Hurry, tonight._" The song came to a close. Yuugi stared at Mokuba, and Mokuba laughed softly, light blush tinting his cheeks. "So, **Santa**, should I tell you what I want for Christmas?" He sounded like the Mokuba that Yuugi knew, the little boy that shouted insults and bragged on his brother's behalf and did all those boyish things. On the other hand, he still looked like that very sexy Mokuba that had just been singing. The only explanation was that they WERE the same person; there was no clone. 

"Uh… yes?" Yuugi all but squeaked, shifting in his pillow suit. Actually, those pillows were shifting quiet nicely, covering all the right things at all the right times… After all, he was a guy, and any guy that had a sexy Mokuba perched on his lap like a toddler would have a few… _problems_. Mokuba licked his lips and leaned closer to Yuugi's ear like he was sharing a secret; the shirt finally slipped off his shoulder, just a little bit. 

Yuugi was going to have a cardiac event. 

"Well, it's not very big - at least, not much bigger than me." Yup; that was Yuugi's heart seizing up. "And it's not loud; it won't bother anyone at all, maybe not even my brother." His breath was shortening; death was imminent. Was that a shining light at the end of the tunnel? …No, it was Mokuba's bare shoulder; Yuugi liked that more. "And it's very sweet, and I like looking at it." Right about then is when Yuugi should have died… but chance must have spared him. Or maybe there was some other rational explanation for his reaction to Mokuba's wishes, something more logical than death. "And if I could get it on Christmas - maybe a little sooner - I'd be really happy." Libido seemed to be the most rational. "Do you think you can do that, **Santa**?" 

Yuugi gulped and tried to find his voice; it had to have been in there somewhere. "Ah, sweet, you say?" 

"Mm-hm," Mokuba nodded. "Very sweet." Another kiss, stolen quickly, and there was no flash of the camera; Jounouchi was swearing. He must have run out of film. When Yuugi got the chance he was going to make fun of Jounouchi for it… that was, when he didn't have more interesting and perplexing people to concentrate on. Yuugi was going to forever label Mokuba as a tease; anyone would if faced with his little tantalizing kisses that hardly lasted long enough. "Mint-y, even." 

"Candy canes," Yuugi admitted softly. Oh, right, he was still Santa. His voice was firmer as he said, "Well, uh, I'll definitely see what I can do." 

"Thank you, **Santa**." Mokuba really seemed to enjoy emphasizing that word. How strange. Yuugi didn't move as Mokuba reached into his back pocket and took out a small folded piece of paper; he placed it in Yuugi's hand. "Merry Christmas." And then Mokuba was off his lap, walking - hell, running! - out of the room like an excited kid. Like an overactive twelve year old. Like… well, Mokuba. Yuugi looked at the small white paper; it was torn along the edges, and he saw the beginnings of the Kaiba Corp. logo in one corner. Great: Kaiba Corp. stationary. Kaiba was probably tracking his location via satellite and planning his painful demise as punishment for touching his younger brother, all through a piece of paper. Or maybe Yuugi was overreacting. He unfolded the piece of paper. 

A number. A phone number, with the words "Merry Christmas" printed messily beneath. Yuugi grinned. 

Merry Christmas indeed. Mokuba would just have to wait and see what Santa had in store for him. 

**-end-**

* * *

**- more notes -**  
Lemme tell you, I had that song on repeat while I was writing that particular part, and I was SO sick of it by the time I was done, lol. XD It's a fun song, though. 

This whole thing is written mostly because I really think it's a cute visual. Lol. Cuteness is always fun, you know? And it's the holidays. But you know, I'm really proud of how it turned out. I'm not sure why.   
Do I think 12-year-old Mokuba would actually sing Marilyn Monroe to Yuugi? No.   
Would he actually wear that? Well, I WISH, but probably not.   
Wow, that sounded super perverted, lol. But you know, he came off as sort of (very?) feminine. Whups; I didn't mean to do that. But I don't know, some of the outfits in Yu-Gi-Oh can be pretty outrageous, so… 

So, anyway, Nyoko (LadyNyoko?) told me to write a YuugixMokuba Christmas fic… and for a while I had no idea to write. Then I was sitting at a kids' Christmas party and I heard this song come over the speakers. Since I couldn't hear it all that well, I sort of misunderstood the meaning, but it occurred me that it would be funny to imagine one of the guys singing it to another… THEN I remember the YuugixMokuba thing… and it all sort of fell into place! Then I read the lyrics and went "Oh damn, that's not what she meant," so the meaning is a little skewed for this story… uhm… I'm sorry. :) I snuck my way around it by only paying half-attention to the lyrics in the prose, lol. Sneaky me! 

So usually I don't like song-fic (at least, I don't like writing them; I've read one or two I like), but it was sort of hard to avoid using song lyrics here. I think it makes sense, since the lyrics aren't just thrown in there randomly; they have purpose & place. I didn't see a way to avoid using them, so I just went with it. Hope it worked. 

And, of course, **Happy Holidays**! 


End file.
